He's aware of his own tempering. Yet of course, what servant of their god would ever say that they didn't want to serve them?
His lips part as though to speak but...the words won't come. A part of him rebels at the thought of ever carving Zodiark's essence out of his own soul. It had been the only way he could still feel connected to Hythlodaeus these past twelve thousand years or so.
"I-- chose this. Why should I give it up?" he replies haltingly. Elidibus' admonishment and warning to not harm the Warrior of Light comes to mind. "Zodiark saved our star. I will serve Him to my dying breath."
Hythlodaeus watches his friend intently. He can see that some sort of inner struggle is going on... but this is beyond his knowledge. He knows Hades well, but the twelve millennia between them and the experiences Hades has had mean that there are things Hythlodaeus doesn't, can't know.
"... You've always been very dutiful. Even when 'tis too heavy a burden on you."
There are things he doesn't know, yes. But there are also things that he does. Hythlodaeus keeps his eyes on his friend - partner - as he says that. Any change in expression will be a clue to him whether he's on the right track.
Despite Hades's protestations, Hythlodaeus can feel that something is wrong here. His friend has always been dutiful, yes, but even when faced with the hardest tasks and sleepless nights, Hades would have that stubborn fire in him, when his responsibility was his pride as well. But right now... that fire is not there. The brief time that Hythlodaeus had seen Hades like this was at the very start of his tenure as Emet-Selch; when he was still wracked with conflict and worry of whether he will be able to shoulder this responsibility.
When is he not tired? He can't even bring himself to retort with that because it's true. He's desperately tired. He wants to lie down and let the aetherial sea wash away every worry and regret. But he can't abandon his duty or his people, he can't.
"I can't rest. Not until everyone is--"
Ah, but that's pointless too.
Hades leans forwards and tries to hide his face against Hythlodaeus' shoulder. "I have to save them," he mumbles. "I must..."
His eyes slowly close and the tension in him gradually unwinds.
"A few decades of sleep sound quite pleasant..." he mumbles. If only this flesh and blood body were capable of such a thing. "Could you sing me to my slumber, old friend...?"
Hythlodaeus smiles to himself. Well, that seems to be a success!
"Gladly, my dear. Although if you do fall asleep for a few decades, I would feel rather lonely after a while."
Despite the joke, though, he starts to hum a lullaby - the same he'd sung in the maze. Should Hades indeed doze off, Hythlodaeus would be glad to carry him to his bed for a nap.
Lulled by his friend's gentle humming, Hades soon drifts to sleep. He's wholly unaware of being carried to his bed (later he might wonder how Hythlodaeus managed the strength to do so) but for the first time in a very long time, his sleep isn't troubled by apparitions of the past.
It may not be the decade of sleep that he desires, but it's better than none.
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His lips part as though to speak but...the words won't come. A part of him rebels at the thought of ever carving Zodiark's essence out of his own soul. It had been the only way he could still feel connected to Hythlodaeus these past twelve thousand years or so.
"I-- chose this. Why should I give it up?" he replies haltingly. Elidibus' admonishment and warning to not harm the Warrior of Light comes to mind. "Zodiark saved our star. I will serve Him to my dying breath."
Literally, he thinks with a silent, bitter laugh.
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"... You've always been very dutiful. Even when 'tis too heavy a burden on you."
There are things he doesn't know, yes. But there are also things that he does. Hythlodaeus keeps his eyes on his friend - partner - as he says that. Any change in expression will be a clue to him whether he's on the right track.
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"'Tis not a burden when I'm simply righting a wrong," he mutters. "I swore to do what is best for our people. For our star."
Yes. What he does is the bare minimum expected for someone of his office. And yet, he feels discontented about it.
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"But you are tired. Aren't you, Hades?"
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"I can't rest. Not until everyone is--"
Ah, but that's pointless too.
Hades leans forwards and tries to hide his face against Hythlodaeus' shoulder. "I have to save them," he mumbles. "I must..."
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"You must rest, Hades. And you know I am not above using every trick in my book to drag you out when you get too caught up in your work."
Thinking about it, now that they've started a romantic relationship Hythlodaeus has a lot more new tricks in that book.
"... This is not our star, Hades. You have no duties here."
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"A few decades of sleep sound quite pleasant..." he mumbles. If only this flesh and blood body were capable of such a thing. "Could you sing me to my slumber, old friend...?"
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"Gladly, my dear. Although if you do fall asleep for a few decades, I would feel rather lonely after a while."
Despite the joke, though, he starts to hum a lullaby - the same he'd sung in the maze. Should Hades indeed doze off, Hythlodaeus would be glad to carry him to his bed for a nap.
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It may not be the decade of sleep that he desires, but it's better than none.