[avalon] IC Inbox

[emet_sulk]

I am currently not available at the moment.
If you were directed here by Hythlodaeus, kindly inform him that any messes he creates are his responsibility to clean up.

If this is Hythlodaeus: Please act like a bureau chief for once in your life and stop referring complaints to me.


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[emet_sulk]

[ Oh, the irony of Bakugou, of all people, telling someone else to calm down...

Emet-Selch continues to glare but he crosses his arms and looks away, directing his ire at some innocent corner instead. ]

...The one who isn't here. The one who left us as the calamity drew closer and closer to our city. The one who has been dead for the past several thousand years with nothing to show for their final efforts.

[ The words are spat out like a bitter curse. Odd - for such a good friend, he almost sounds like he hates them. ]

The world knew them as Azem. I knew them as one of my closest friends. They left to find a way to halt the catastrophe on our doorstep, but they never returned.

[apshot]

[ Yeah well... Bakugou thinks he understands the bitter tone. The old man is just that type of person. Not to mention it's probably complicated. Someone who goes off to solve a problem a different way than what you envision... That might feel like betrayal. Abandonment. ]

What? You pissed off that they didn't come back? Might not have been their fault.

[emet_sulk]

No. I was disappointed that they left at all.

[ He doesn't want to talk about it. But since this boy appears as stubborn as a dog with a bone about getting answers, he decides to give them the bare minimum to satisfy their curiosity. ]

Our people were looking to us for guidance. In a time of great uncertainty, we were expected to lead. Yet not only did my friend step down from their seat, they left the city on some mad quest to find another way to halt the oncoming calamity. As if we hadn't already debated the merits of such a course. As if we hadn't almost unanimously decided upon a solution in that same forum.

[ His expression tightens. ] Even after our city fell, they never returned. I assume they died, like all the rest of our people. We left their seat and title empty for twelve thousand years.

So you see, boy, why I yearn to meet them again.

[apshot]

[ There's a comment he wants to make. Right there on the tip of the tongue. About how the people had been divided between wanting to leave the city to help and others wanting to leave the outside world to their own devices. He remembers that being a pretty hot topic for debate. But what if they had tried to get ahead of the calamity or whatever before it became a problem?

But he won't say it. ]

It wasn't unanimous if your friend was clearly against it. They did what they felt was right.

[ Although he can understand the feeling of someone you trust running off and doing things alone. But whatever... Neither here nor there. ]

Even if you wanted to see them again, you know it wasn't them.

[emet_sulk]

I said I knew that, did I not? [ he says harshly. ] Even I desire some escapism once in a while. You wish to know what you can do differently? Then I would thank you to leave me alone next time.

[ So what if he had been dragged into the water? So what if he drowned? He cannot die enough deaths to make up for the thousands upon thousands who perished because of his failings. ]

[apshot]

[ He... Really should, huh? Just leave it alone... Leave the old man to just... ]

Nah. I can't do that. Believe me. I would really fucking like to leave it alone but nah.

[emet_sulk]

Why? [ he snaps. ] I doubt you truly care about my life. I care nothing for yours. Is this related to-- what was it again? How I looked as though I needed saving?

[ He scoffs and waves his hand dismissively. ]

You're rather too late for that if so.

[apshot]

Doesn't matter if you give a shit about mine or not. You don't really seem to care about yours so someone probably should.

[ Not that Bakugou is a great guy. However he knows more about this asshole than what's probably right or fair. Someone who thinks that they have to carry some goddamn burden alone - to the point where they don't think of their own damn lives.

Yeah, he knows this guy has done some pretty heinous shit. Bakugou doesn't know why all this fucking matters to him either. Maybe because of those stupid subconscious dreams they shared. ]

[emet_sulk]

[ He glowers a little while longer at Bakugou. They're right - he doesn't particularly care about his own life these days. Only his thin promise to certain people keeps him waking up each day (to say nothing of Hythlodaeus himself). ]

I don't need you - or anyone else - to care about my life. Especially not a mortal. No amount of explaining will help you comprehend what it's like to live for as long as I have. If I wish to die then that is my own damn choice.

[apshot]

Yeah well... Tough shit. You're not the one that gets to decide that sort of thing.

[ But notice that he's not begging the old man to explain it to him. To help Bakugou really to understand what it is like. There's no way he really can, even if he had experienced it in part. It's still not his life. Hasn't spent eons longing for something that has long since passed. ]

Imma do what Imma do. That's all there is to it.

[emet_sulk]

Fine.

[ This is not an argument he's going to win. He stomps off to the kitchenette, opening cupboards, carelessly creating noise where he needn't.

He wishes his life were his own, he thinks furiously. He wishes that none of them were here to stop him from taking it, to make him feel guilty about even entertaining the thought of abandoning life without them. ]

If you plan to sit there all day then tell me what you cannot eat - or don't. 'Tis all the same to me.

[apshot]

[ Oh it's definitely not. Bakugou's simply going to do what he wants regardless of what this old man has to say on the matter. Though it is a little surprising that he... Is going to accept that?

Though it would be interesting for Katsuki to know that this old shit has had similar issues with others here. ]

So what? First you're pissed off and then you're asking me in a roundabout, dismissive way what I'll eat?

[emet_sulk]

Stubborn boy. I would prefer you leave, actually.

[ Bakugou isn't the first immovable wall he has had to navigate around and he probably won't be the last. ]

Since I suspect you won't even if I say so, I am going to make my midday repast.

[apshot]

I only came here to talk and shit. Not bother you to the point of throwing some mediocre meal my way.

[ Pushing himself up now. For real though, he's not inviting himself for anything other than conversation. The old man obliged. Katsuki's made his intentions known. That's all there really is to it.

No need to push further. ]

[emet_sulk]

Hmph. Be on your way then.

[ He makes a dismissive, shooing motion with one hand without looking, focused on his task. If he could, he would like to forget that whole siren episode ever happened. The reminder leaves him feeling sour and he rattles around the kitchen with much more noise than usual. ]